Failure to Communicate

“What we have here is a failure to communicate.” These words were spoken in the movie Cool Hand Luke and today we hear them repeated over and over.  The reason we remember this statement is that we can all relate and we clearly understand what it means. How many times have you thought, when faced with a problem, if they had only listened to me. Or have you ever been told that the other person just didn’t understand what you meant.

 

 An example in a business situation is Charlie. Charlie is a new sales manager who decided that in order to increase sales, the sales force would need to generate new accounts. At his next sales meeting he told the sales staff the following: Every one is expected to bring in new business this month. At the end of the month, sales were up slightly but the sales force had not generated any new accounts. When Charlie asked them why they had not generated any new accounts, they responded that they didn’t know that he meant business from new accounts.

 

What happened?  It is obvious he did not communicate clearly to the sales force. He never told them what he really wanted nor did he ask if they clearly understood how they were expected to increase sales. What could Charlie have done differently?

  1. He could have written down what he wanted to say such as: I want each of you to get a specific amount of business this month from new accounts in addition to the amount of business that you have been getting from existing accounts.
  2. He could have role played it with another person and asked them what they understood by his request
  3. He could have asked all the sales staff at the meeting to tell him how they expected to accomplish the goal
  4. He could have asked them to update him regularly on their progress

 

Communication is not a precise science. It is not the exact transfer of information from one mind to another. Communication is the exchange of ideas between people. It involves not just telling but as importantly listening. Unless the person on the receiving end is receptive to the thoughts being sent, no real communication occurs. If you make a phone call but are unable to make a connection then there would be no sense in talking.

This is true of any form of communication. If no connection is made then no communication occurs.

 

In business and in our personal lives, in order to be an effective communicator we must first put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. We must be empathic and try to understand how our message might be received. We must give them the message clearly, concisely and then check to make sure that the recipients understand the meaning and what is expected on them.

If you are thinking that you do not have the time to communicate that specifically, then ask yourself how much time do I have to make up for the mistakes that could occur for not being clear.

 

In order to understand how to get your message across, it is important to examine

four fundamental principles of successful interpersonal communication:

  1. The human mind can only fully concentrate on one thought at a time. So don’t make the communication too complicated.
  2. The human mind transposes words into pictures. Different words mean different things to different people.
  3. Too many words will clutter up communications. Be concise. When communicating keep it as simple and to the point as possible.
  4. Be aware that communication always involves non-verbal communication. As an example, if someone is telling you that they are very concerned about you and your issue but takes a cell phone call in the middle of the conversation, they are clearly saying  non- verbally that you are not very important.

 

Finally, the most effective tool we have for communicating is listening. Benjamin Disraeli noted that “nature has given us two ears but only one mouth.” This may be nature’s way of telling us that listening is vital to our ability to effectively communicate. Below are some effective listening tips:

                            1. Take time to listen

                            2. Be attentive

                            3. Listen with an open mind

                            4. Listen for feelings

                            5. Listen for retention

 

 

In summary, for communication to be effective it must be two-way. Both people have to be focused on the conversation and one has to be listening. “To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” Anthony Robbins